Do what you aren't obligated to do. That's the secret. You don't have to forgive the person that did the most horrible thing. You have no reason to care for another who's done nothing good, ever. You don't owe a thief. Or a murderer compassion or understanding. But do what they have no right to expect and what you have no duty to give. And when you understand that the world isn't fair. And strive to live fairness without prejudice, knowing that the people you serve may not be deserving of anything from anyone. Live the remedy, and the justice, and the fair thing that you hope for but never find. You'll find out what love really is.